Apparently Plasticity Runs in the Family…

January 27th, 2010

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As if she wasn’t getting enough scrutiny for her recent plastic surgery antics, Heidi Montag has now announced her plan for giving her mom a “mommy makeover” for Mother’s Day this year.

Reports have surfaced that Heidi’s mama was NOT happy when she found out her daughter had secretly gone under the knife. However, according to Heidi, her mother was well aware of her plan.

“I’ve had this conversation with her several times. So I think she knew,” she tells Nightline. “I already heard what she had to say.”

Heidi claims the only thing she didn’t tell her mom was the date of the surgery because “I didn’t want it to be a circus. And I didn’t want it to be crazy media outside my house.”

And although she’s apparently furious with her daughter’s decision, Heidi says her mom is ready to be the next to go under the knife!

“Actually, she was excited for me and she’s asking me … for her surgery next,” says Heidi. “So for Mother’s Day, I have to ask [surgeon] Dr. Frank Ryan if he’ll do the mommy makeover.”

Ew… this family is just sick.

Heidi Montag: Cat Lady’s Mini-Me?

January 27th, 2010

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Get this! Fame whore Heidi Montag is receiving an abundance of hate mail over her recent extreme makeover!

After going under the knife in 2007 to get bigger knockers and a nose job, she claimed, “No more surgery for me!” But as usual, girl was talking a load of bullshit, and rushed back to her surgeon for a more than $50,000 full-body transformation on Nov. 20, 2009.

Montag has had a lot of dreams and aspirations, to become a full blown reality-TV star, a mommy, a pop star and most recently, Cat Woman’s mini-me!

While Heidi might be completely satisfied with her new look, the rest of the world thinks it’s completely ridiculous! So crazy that people have gone out of their way to send the fame whore hate mail!

“Spencer ordered about seven bunches of flowers to cheer up Heidi because she’d received a letter or an e-mail saying that her plastic surgery was against God’s will,” a neighbor of the couple tells Life and Style. “Heidi’s apparently very spiritual, so this kind of criticism really stings.”

In addition to the randoms across the country, even a handful of Montag’s friends think her decision to undergo ten bogus surgeries was a bit much and even unnecessary.

“She looks like Cat Lady,” a pal of Heidi’s tells Life & Style. “It’s all a little too much.”

Spencer was also shocked by her initial appearance, and not in a good way! “He loved how Heidi looked before this surgery,” a friend of Spencer’s tells Life & Style. “Because she’s still swollen and the surgery hasn’t settled yet, he’s a bit shocked.”

One question for ya Heidi, have you stopped smiling yet???

Tila Judges Heidi and Spencer… Bitch Please.

January 26th, 2010

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Tila Tequila should be focusing on her own marriage woes these days; however, she is redirecting her anger towards Spencer Pratt’s take on wife, Heidi Montag’s, hideous plastic surgery stunt.

“If that’s your wife, you should love your wife the way she looks,” Tila tells RadarOnline.com in an exclusive interview. “If she did want to get all these surgeries done, if he truly loved her, instead of encouraging her to say, ‘Oh ok, if this makes you feel better,’ he could’ve encouraged her by giving her confidence saying, ‘You look beautiful the way you are honey, I love you naturally. I married you because you’re you, not because you’re this Joan Rivers looking plastic face.’”

Speidi often makes references to their Christian faith, but their artificial lifestyle has people questioning their beliefs, including Tila who says, “Girlfriend, the Bible says you need to love yourself and God Bless you,” Tila addressed Heidi. “You need to quit wasting your money on these God damn plastic surgeries!”

Additionally, Tila goes on to jokingly express her concern that Spencer let Heidi get the surgeries “because now when they fight she can’t make angry faces at him, she’s always going to be smiling.”

Tila, with your ridiculous antics, you have no room to be judging their obnoxious life choices — especially when it comes to relationships. Focus on your own drama please.

Lo’s Fear for Heidi’s Young Viewers…

January 18th, 2010

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Heidi Montag underwent ten absurd surgeries in one day, to come out looking disgustingly plastic. And while having gone through so many procedures in such a short time span seems dangerous, castmate Lo Bosworth feels the real danger lies in the message she’s sending to her younger fans.

“I hope that girls don’t read the article, look at the decisions that Heidi made, and think that’s normal,” Bosworth tells People magazine. “She was quoted as saying that [practically] every celebrity in Hollywood has these procedures done, every day . . . And that’s just not true. I would never want young girls to read that and think it’s the standard that they need to be measured by.”

And while Lo doesn’t agree with Heidi’s decision to massively alter her image, she’s not anti-cosmetic surgery. “I am not against it,” she said on Sunday. However for her, moderation is key.

“If some wrinkles come across my face, sure, I’ll get a little Botox, it’s not a big deal,” she says. “I think you should do what you want to do to take care of yourself. I just hope that the girls who look up to us and watch us don’t look at what Heidi did as the only way to be successful and beautiful.”

Ew, we don’t even understand how Heidi can think of herself as beautiful anymore! Her ridiculously false image is rather sickening…

Heidi & Spencer Pratt Kidnapped?!

January 14th, 2010

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America can only dream!

Police were called to Heidi Montag and Spencer Pratt’s Los Angeles home Wednesday when a nearby onlooker suspected someone from the residence was being kidnapped!

Unfortunately, it appeared to be a false alarm!

“Heidi was covering her head with a pillowcase to avoid the paparazzi on her way into her home. A construction worker saw this from across the street and called police thinking Heidi was being kidnapped,” a rep for the couple told Usmagazine.com.

Heidi hiding from the paparazzi?! Girl must be on drugs because the Pratts are practically BFF with the paps! A possible bad hair day? Or maybe she’d just come from having ten plastic surgery procedures?!

The rep added, “All is well now. Just a false alarm.”

Los Angeles must really care about the Pratts because TMZ.com reported that helicopters and cops with guns were surrounding their home Wednesday afternoon, and that a man — said to have worked for Spencer — was briefly detained.

Too bad the cops didn’t slip and shoot the pillowcase ghost! KIDDING…

Heidi Montag Puts Babies On Hold To Become A Pop star!

January 13th, 2010

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Heidi Montag is back to taking her birth control!

The newlywed — who was eager to become pregnant earlier this year — has new plans for 2010! Heidi says her dream to have kids with husband Spencer Pratt is “kind of hold” right now as she launches her campaign to become a “pop star” with her debut album, Superficial.

Ugh! We’re not sure what’s worse… a Speidi spawn or listening to Heidi’s God awful voice on TV and radio 24/7?! Both sound like quite the nightmare!

“I’m really trying to do this pop star [thing], my first album, so I think that would kind of be distracting from this album coming out,” she said in a radio interview with Ryan Seacrest Tuesday. “But one day I would love to have kids. I don’t know if Spencer quite feels the same way.”

After spending three years working on her debut album which features songs full of R-rated lyrics like, “come eat my panties off of me,” Heidi tells Seacrest that “it’s very personal, empowering music…just about living life and enjoying every moment and living it up–definitely club music.”

Empowering music?! Because instead of some gangsta rapper dude telling some chick to suck his dick, Heidi’s now telling men to come eat her out?!

“I think that Superficial is kind of a double entendre,” she says about the the title of her album. “It’s superficial in a sense that everything in Hollywood is a little superficial. It’s superficial in a positive way too. It’s not what it seems to be, it’s the inside that counts. It’s kind of the unknown and the known.”

Hate to break it to ya sweetie, but your music career will be dunzo in 15 minutes! Stick to Spencer sticking it in you in hopes that you become preggers!

Heidi Montag Gets Naughty!

January 12th, 2010

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Heidi Montag begs us to eat her panties off! Uhh, leave that to hubby Spencer Pratt honey. No one wants to get THAT close to you!

After a long, torturing three years of unsuccessful singles, the wait is finally over! Montag has officially dropped her debut album, Superficial, which features an abundance of uber-scandalous tunes!

For example, the track, I’ll Do It features lyrics that Montag should ONLY be singing to her douche bag hubby.

“I brought some treats / I know that you gon love em,” she sings. “Come eat my panties off of me / Do whatever you feel comes naturally.”

“The wait is over,” she Twittered Tuesday, adding, “I put every dollar I have into this album and put three years of my heart and soul into this! ENJOY!”

Three years just tell the world to eat her panties off? TRAGIC.

Pratt — who’s obsessed with anything he and his wife do — commented on the release of Superficial via Twitter as well.

“Heidi Montag Best Pop Album.”

Doubtful. This girl has no chance in hell of succeeding in the music industry. Just take a look at how much of an epic fail her performance at the Miss Universe Pageant was!

Speidi Celebrates Their One Year Anniversary!

November 23rd, 2009

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It’s definitely a milestone for them because honestly, did any of us really think they would make it that long?!

Spencer and Heidi Pratt celebrated the anniversary of their Nov. 20 Mexican shotgun wedding… but not by each other’s side!

“My spirit will be with my wife, but my body will be ringside at my business partner’s [boxing match],” King Spencer told Jimmy Kimmel during an appearance on his late night talk show Thursday.

Heidi could’ve given two shits as she already had plans to max out her hubby’s credit card all weekend!

“I’ll take his credit card, be in Beverly Hills shopping, and never look back,” she said. “And I have three puppies, so I’ll take them. I like cooking more for them anyway.”

Uhh, are these two really in love with each other or just the fame?

Clearly the fame considering they just released a new book titled, How To Be Famous, and spent all last week hitting up talk-shows in an attempt to promote the shit out if it. Too bad their hard work probably won’t pay off!

After only one pitiful year of marriage, Speidi is already planning to renew their vows because they feel that their second wedding, held April 25 for their hit MTV show The Hills, was ruined by Lauren “LC” Conrad.”

“We got robbed at our second wedding. We lost all the good energy of our first by having LC in the building,” Spencer said of his wife’s ex gal pal.

Uhh, like she really wanted to be there. Production probably forced her ass to show up with a smile on her face!

We’re pulling for the couple’s kid neighbor Enzo to knock some sense into Heidi’s dense as hell brain and convince her to kick King Spencer to the curb!

Not Today Speidi!

November 16th, 2009

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Just this morning, Heidi Montag and her douche bag hubby Spencer Pratt were expected to appear on NBC’s The Today Show to promote their new book, How to Be Famous: Our Guide to Looking the Part, Playing the Press, and Becoming a Tabloid Fixture.

However, the demented duo never made it on camera to promote their lame book or rematch with Al Roker!

“Due to a change in the show’s schedule, we had to cancel the interview with Spencer and Heidi Pratt,” a rep from the show told Usmagazine.com.

Earlier this year, when the couple initially appeared on the program, Al made Heidi cry with his harsh questions. Not only that, but he straight up told Spencer that people think he acts like a “jerk.”

After the interview, Al continued to bash the pair on Twitter, saying, “Heidi and Spencer are an interesting couple. famous for…being infamous. Bad and vacuous behavior. I think we’re at minute 11 of their 15.”

No worries about the book promotion guys… it’s not like anyone was gonna read it anyways! Sorry, but who is going to look to the most obnoxious couple in Hollywood for advice on how to be famous? We’re guessing it reads, “get plastic surgery and act like a douche bag…” Thanks, but no thanks.

Halloween 2009’s Scariest Costume!

October 30th, 2009

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The two most miserable couples in show business just became one!

Heidi Montag and Spencer Pratt are dressing like Jon and Kate Gosselin for Halloween!

“Halloween is supposed to be about scary costumes. What’s scarier than Speidi Plus Eight?” Spencer tells Usmagazine.com. “Any reality stars who can get themselves 55 magazine covers will always have our respect!”

However, out of pure opinion, the costumes will give Speidi some good press. This is because Spencer recently told the New York Post there’s no such thing as bad press.

“That word should never have even been created,” he said. “Remember when you were a kid and you’d make up words? “Bad press” is equivalent to a made up word. Look at Angelina Jolie. She can make out with her brother, have blood around her neck, talk graphic sex with her old boyfriend on the red carpet, steal America’s Sweethearts’s husband and get him to have babies with her. Then she turns around and is the face of UNICEF and a UN ambassador — and Speidi is the bad couple? Come on! I didn’t break up a marriage — how are we the villains in Hollywood. Give me a break.”

Alright, we were convinced for a second that Jon and Kate were the most dramatic and obnoxious couple in the news, but Spencer definitely just regained his reign.

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